Life is full of peaks and valleys, and it’s often the peaks that stick with us most. I had one of those recently: watching my son, Clay, get married.

It felt like it all happened in a blink. I still remember the first time he wrapped his tiny hand around my finger. Then came the years of hockey bags that were bigger than he was, the mix of pride and worry during his teenage years, and eventually, the milestone of seeing him step into a career after college. Each of those moments led to this new chapter, one where he’s now building a marriage, shaping a career, and maybe someday, starting a family of his own.

During the wedding weekend, I found myself thinking about how much our daily decisions matter. Not just the big, dramatic ones but the small, everyday choices we make. Over time, those quiet decisions shape our relationships, our careers, and ultimately, the kind of life we build.

I also found myself thinking about struggle. How it often ends up being the turning point for real growth. There’s a lot of encouragement these days to take the easier path, but I’ve learned that challenge is where we grow the most. Discomfort builds resilience. It sharpens our perspective. And though it’s never easy, struggle has a way of offering lessons we often miss in the moment. With time, it gives us clarity and quiet strength.

At the wedding dinner, I shared a story about how a small choice I made over 30 years ago led me to meet Janine. That one decision changed everything, leading to our marriage, our family, a lifetime of memories. It reminded me how powerful a single moment can be.

The same’s been true in my career. From starting as a CPA, to taking a risk on healthcare, to leading startups and navigating mergers, I’ve made plenty of mistakes. But those mistakes taught me more than any textbook ever could. They gave me the perspective I needed to lead organizations like U.S. Oncology and Humana. And what I came to understand is that strategy and execution only go so far. To build something meaningful, you need hands, head, and heart … the work you do, the thought behind it, and the care you bring to the people around you.

Watching Clay begin this next phase brought back memories of the choices Janine and I made over the years. We tried to stay grounded in our core priorities of family, career, health, and relationships. There were trade-offs, of course, and I’ll admit at times I lost sight of the balance, especially with the demands of work. But that shared commitment helped steady us during life’s hardest times. It allowed us to show up when our kids needed us most and be there for each other when it counted.

Life tests us. Not every season is marked by joy. There are chapters filled with loss, setbacks, and deep personal challenges. And while those moments are tough to navigate, they often shape us in ways joy alone cannot. They stretch our capacity for empathy, deepen our sense of purpose, and instill a humility we often lack early on. I can see now I lacked some of this when I was younger but choosing to face adversity instead of avoiding it helped me grow. It was never easy, but it was always worth it. The point is, when we fully show up in the toughest times, we come out stronger, wiser, and more connected to what really matters.

That’s what I kept coming back to during the wedding weekend. That life really is the sum of our choices, especially how we respond when things get hard. And when the path feels uncertain, staying grounded in your core values can help steady you and point you in the right direction.

It reminded me of something I’ve shared before about life being a lot like tending a tomato garden. Each day, you get one bucket, representing your time, your energy, your attention. You have to choose where to pour it. Some days, you’re watering with care. Other days, you’re just trying to keep things from drying out. But over time, it’s those small, consistent efforts that lead to growth. You can’t rush it. You can’t fake it. The good stuff comes after the patience, the care, and the belief that the little things really do matter.

As I watched Clay step into this new chapter, I felt immense gratitude for all of it. The joy, the struggle, the growth, the mess. Because each day, each choice, each experience adds up to something meaningful. And that’s more than I could ever hope for.

If there’s one lesson I’ve learned and keep learning, it’s this: don’t underestimate the power of your daily choices. They might feel small, but they’re shaping your life. One of my favorite sayings captures it well: The way you do anything is the way you do everything.

Every action leaves a mark. Make it count.