I wanted to build on my earlier post about impermanence and resilience. Over time, I’ve learned that
when rooted in something greater—like purpose—change becomes an opportunity. Talk of “purpose”
might sound lofty, but it’s really the foundation that guides everything else in our lives.
Early on, I thought finding my purpose was as simple as choosing a path and sticking to it. But
experience has taught me that purpose isn’t a one-time thing and is something that grows and evolves
with us, shaped by our relationships with family, friends, and others who matter, and by our unique
talents. It isn’t fixed and can expand and change with our experiences (both positive and negative) and
be strengthened through the right circumstances and connections.
Finding our purpose isn’t always easy, but it’s a journey worth pursuing. My own path was filled with
obstacles: broken relationships, jobs that left me unfulfilled, bosses who didn’t inspire, and bills I
couldn’t keep up with. Those struggles though became catalysts for growth. Facing adversity head-on
taught me to understand the “why” behind it, and from there, I began to define my purpose and values,
which ultimately helped me bring balance and joy to my life.

Looking back, one of things I’m most grateful for is the childhood I had. It was filled with love and care,
which gave me a strong foundation of values. But it was the tough times that really built my resilience
and empathy. Several key moments shaped my sense of purpose: seeing my parents’ dedication to their
work, receiving support when my mom battled alcoholism, and the heartbreak of losing her during a
painful time in my own life. These events, while difficult, provided the bedrock for my purpose.
In my early adult years, I realized I had certain tendencies toward trying to manage situations too
tightly—something that became more pronounced after losing my mom and experiencing a divorce. In
an effort to cope, I began researching and learning all I could about the impact of alcoholism on families.
I read books, sought counseling, and what I uncovered was enlightening. Growing up in an environment
affected by alcoholism often brings instability and disorder, leading many of us to adopt behaviors
aimed at bringing order to the chaos. By my mid-20s, I understood I needed to address this and learn to
trust others, seek balance, and engage with people from a place of understanding rather than control.
Confronting these aspects of myself was challenging, but it also opened the door to incredible growth.
This self-awareness is what drove me to seek more balance and purpose in my life, leading me to
redefine my “why” and find a more centered way of living.
Through my readings, I also learned the difference between two types of happiness—hedonic and
eudaimonic. Hedonic happiness is all about pleasure and avoiding pain, the fleeting joy of a good meal
or a fun evening with friends. Eudaimonic happiness, on the other hand, is deeper and comes from living
with purpose and engaging in personal growth. Early in my career, I often chased hedonic happiness but
that joy was short-lived. A small but meaningful event shifted my perspective. During a challenging time,
I began attending church and volunteering. The messages of service, along with my volunteer work,
opened my eyes to the lasting fulfillment of helping others. The more I engaged, the stronger my desire
to serve grew, ultimately giving me a deep sense of purpose.
Since then, service has become a core part of who I am. My goal now is simple: to help people where I
can, driven by curiosity, hard work, and a focus on staying balanced and healthy. Looking back on the
years I’ve spent volunteering, I see that service is what grounds me. It’s what pushes me to put others
first, lead by example, and always try to make things a little better than they were before.

Finding purpose doesn’t happen overnight—it’s something that takes shape over time, through the key
moments in our lives. By reflecting on those experiences, we start to figure out what really drives us.
Purpose gives us direction when things get tough and adds meaning to our successes. Without it, it’s
easy to get caught up in distractions or chase things that don’t really matter.
If you’ve already figured out your “why,” that’s great—I hope it’s helping you focus on what’s most
important. If you’re still figuring it out, I hope my story shows you it’s worth taking the time to discover
what makes life meaningful. It’s a journey that pays off.